Loneliness can sneak into life at almost predictable times—after the death of a loved one, a move to another location, a new job amid strange surroundings and people who seem distant, an unexpected end to a relationship, a spouse being deployed to Iraq. Loneliness can also invade for no understandable reason when your life seems normal to everyone except yourself. You feel blue and alone. You believe that no one understands you or your situation in life, your emptiness, your aloneness.

The good and bad of loneliness

At times it is good to be alone, to live with yourself, to make the most of your time of loneliness, to pray and meditate on God’s love and forgiveness and the truth that in Jesus you are his new creation. You come away refreshed and renewed. Page through the hymnal and see how hymnwriters dealt with difficulties of life that must have triggered loneliness. See how they found their strength in God and marched forward in his company and with his forgiving power. Then they saw a new life of opportunity to display his love to others.

But loneliness generally does not feel good. Whether you are single or married, it can infiltrate your thoughts and well-being and strip you of energy, creativity, and cheerfulness. It can lead you down a spiraling staircase to desperation or unhelpful relationships if left unchecked. This can turn into self-pity, which makes you miserable to yourself and those around you. Its prolonged agony is not good. It can turn to despair and danger, which may require medical help and further attention.

Walking out of loneliness into a new role

No matter what the cause of your loneliness, seek out a Christian who will listen to you and guide you toward God’s help and that of others.

The comforting words of Jesus, “I am with you always,” can lead you to sing “What a friend we have in Jesus,” and turn your pathways back to stability and a productive walk with the Spirit. You know that God has helped in the past, that his help endures, and that he is a present, inspiring power in your life.

In Christ there is a ray of hope and brightness for you after your long night of loneliness. His hand lifts up your chin to see the sunshine of God’s love. He gives you the encouragement to stand up and walk in the joy of a new day, a day in which you will see your life in a new perspective. It doesn’t take long, but you soon realize that many around you have walked in your shoes and marched out of loneliness into the fullness of a productive life.